These movie ideas from college students tell us something about the minds of young people, and the perhaps the future, but what? I started thinking, what if it were all one big glorious movie? The treatment would read like this:

Resistance fighter Biro is captured and subjected to secret Nazi experiments to create super-strength humans. The mutant human guinea pigs turn on the Nazis and destroy the secret laboratory. Biro’s grandson Taylor grows up and moves to New York, where he is introduced to a mysterious, charismatic young man named Chris. Later, Taylor finds his sister Liz is living in the same city, and takes her to a party at Chris’s where everyone wears bizarre costumes and gets extremely intoxicated. Turns out Chris’s father, Evan, is despondent after losing his wife in a car accident. Evan is depressed. By happenstance he meets a homeless guy, Ralph. They become friends and Evan allows Ralph to move in with him until Ralph can get up on his feet. Evan’s co-workers think it is weird. Ralph steals money because he is a compulsive gambler. Meanwhile, in West Virginia, summer camp counselor Kelliegh falls in love chastely with fellow counselor Brendon. They agree that Brendon will visit Kelliegh at her college in Pennsylvania (from his college in Ohio) in the fall. Kelliegh arrives at college and meets her dorm mate, Hartley. They go to frat parties and bond, while Kelliegh looks forward to Brendon’s visit. The next thing Kelliegh learns is that Brendon jumped off his own dorm roof minutes after talking to her on the phone, in an apparent suicide. Complicating matters is the fact that Zombies terrorize the small college town. The humans fight back, except for Steven, a hot high school basketball talent with his dreams set on a division one college. But, a late-season injury takes him out of the running. It’s an emotional ride with his girlfriend, parents, and coaches as he struggles to recover from a fractured ankle. He fights his way back, but never makes the division one schools. In the end, he settles for a division three school. When Steven’s parents decide to send Steven’s younger developmentally disabled brother, Casey, to a boarding institution, Steven kidnaps Casey and goes on a road trip with the girl of this dreams and his best friend. Trouble is, the girl of his dreams is into his best friend. The next day Taylor can’t find his sister anywhere. She’s disappeared. When he goes back to Chris’s, Chris introduces him to heroin. Taylor becomes a junkie and falls in with a prostitute named Greta. Later they find Lily’s purse, and then Lily, who has gone insane. The police kill Greta. Chris tries to move in with his father, but he can’t stand Ralph living there. Taylor joins the Special Forces and moves to the west coast. After a major earthquake, the Special Forces commandoes battle a secret race of Aliens under the streets of San Francisco. Back in New York, Ralph gets a job at Cold Stone Creamery, but it doesn’t stick. When Ralph steals the engagement ring Evan bought for his fiancé, Evan throws him out. Ralph pulls some tricks to leave Evan a sum of money, but in doing so Ralph runs afoul of some bad people. Evan finds Ralph dead in an alley, and ends up just like he was after his wife died. Meanwhile, aspiring Rap singer David wins a trip to New York from his home in Africa. But before he can get to the airport, David and friend Benji are kidnapped by rebel forces and beaten into becoming child soldiers. After witnessing, and participating, in many atrocities, David and Benji are captured by U.N. forces. Steven, Casey, the girl of Steven’s dreams, and Steven’s best friend make it to the beach where Steven and Casey’s sister tragically died a year before. When the parents and cops converge on the runaways, there is catharsis, and a promise to keep Casey within the family home always. With years of effort and determination, Steven becomes an astronaut. He joins a three-year mission to Mars, but he and his fellow astronauts gradually became paranoid and violent. Things get more complicated when one of the astronauts escapes the ship only to discover that they are really in a simulator hanger on Earth. The hanger houses the secret offices of a private assassination company, where Ex-U.N. commander Max works. After his last job, he tells his boss Cecile that he intends to quit and get married. Soon after, Max’s fiancé is murdered. Max goes on a mission of revenge to find the truth, ultimately discovering that his boss Cecile killed his fiancé. At the same time, an alcoholic ex-tennis pro attempts a comeback as a coach to his niece, a young tennis prodigy named Kelliegh. But Kelliegh suspects foul play in the supposed suicide of her beloved Brendon. Things aren’t going well with roommate Hartley, and Kelliegh does not get along with her psychologist. Hartley begins to stalk Kelliegh, and in the end Kelliegh discovers the truth: jealous Hartley pushed Brendon off the dorm roof. Murder. Back in Africa, while recovering in a mental hospital, David and Benji are attacked by an armed, deranged patient. Benji uses his body as a human shield to protect David. Benji is killed, but David survives and is relocated to New York, where he meets Julian. Julian’s father wants him to play sports and work in the family construction business, but Julian is fascinated with Katie, a high school harp player in orchestra, and Julian wants to learn to play the harp like Katie. Because Julian spends so much time with David, everyone comes to suspect that Julian is gay. But in reality, he has met a girl. She’s strange, beautiful, and reclusive. She will be his girl, but only on the condition that Julian never tell anyone about her, and that they only meet in secret. Julian is a changed boy, but soon the worst happens: the girl disappears, and Julian can’t get anyone to believe that there ever even was a girl. Eventually, her bones are found buried in Julian’s backyard. What does it mean?

David Warfield