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Hi “Drink till We’re Funny Comedy Collective”,

I understand you’re about to go on a world tour, starting with Baltimore’s own lovely Ottobar this Saturday. I know you’ve been around for 6 years or so, delighting audiences with free shows in and around Baltimore. Here’s a few questions to entertain and inform our handsome What Weekly readership.

1) Do you ever feel uncomfortable having a name encouraging drinking in the world of comedy which is so beset by crippling addiction and the attendant loss and pain?

T. Brad – As the founder of the weekly “Drink Till We’re Funny” comedy show, where we all met, we thought it was the perfect name for a comedy show held in a bar as well as for the tour. Would you prefer we perform at AA meetings? We could call it “One Laugh at a Time”. Or “Pray Till We’re Funny”. And the comedy world is no more or less affected by addiction than any other form of entertainment. People are going to make their own bad choices – dick jokes or otherwise.

Matt – It’s better than having a name encouraging bombing in a world where actual bombs make people cripples who experience a lot of loss and pain.

Jay – Nah.  People tend to be funny when they had a few drinks.  I’ve never met a funny heroin addict.

Chris – Only until we’ve had enough to drink to where we can stop the delirium tremors.  After that, we’re just comfortably numb.

Drew – Pain is funny.

2) Do you feel worried that Baltimore fast food restaurants will suffer due to a lack of workers when a whole bunch of local comedians leave town at once?

T. Brad – I have no idea and I said onion rings instead of fries, jerkoff.

Matt – What does it take to be a writer these days?  Is it just sending an email to the Examiner saying you’re an expert on farmer’s markets or is it more than that?

Jay – Whatever. I didn’t bust my ass to make night manager to be harassed by some guy who writes for a school paper.  Sorry, look I’m really an assistant manager. Don’t tell my wife.

Chris – From a sanitation stand point, you actually WANT all of the local comedians to leave town at once.  EVERYONE GO TO ARBY’S, NOW!!!

Drew – I can’t speak for the rest of the group. But I know that while I’m gone from my job, there will be fewer complaints from customers about finding piss in their happy meals.

3) Collectively what’s your favorite color?  Did arriving at this cause tension within the group?

T. Brad – What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Matt – Pink.

Jay – Fecal Green.  It’s not quite poop but yeah…it’s poop.

Chris – As far as pigmentation is concerned?  Jesus, just look at the tour poster!  (Please note, DTWF does not condone racism, and we totally voted for Jesse Jackson in 1984.)

Drew – Green. It’s the color of money. Since we’re comics, none of us have any, so it’s an intriguing color to us.

4) You’ve got an awesome team of comics to represent Baltimore!  Tell me about how 7 white men and 1 woman can share the hopes and dreams of a city that is 65% black and 50% female.

T. Brad – Kim is actually a man. And I really don’t think your black and female readers will care for you implying that they aren’t smart enough to understand our brand of white humor. We changed the original name of the tour already – Ku Klux Klowns – what the hell else do you want from us?

Matt – When those groups have a vote we’ll worry about catering to them.

Jay – Pleae dont dash my dreams of being 65% of a Black woman.  Look white people have dreams too.  Most of them include moving out of Baltimore.

Chris – We notice that you didn’t mention the race of our female comic.  Is that because you think women are unable to handle the pressures of representing an entire race?  Totally sexist on your part.

Drew – Represent Baltimore? Fuck this place. It’s a dump. We’re basically Detroit with crab cakes.
5) Would you like to link to your kickstarter page? Does it ever bother you when people call you glorified panhandlers?

T. Brad – I have actually never heard anyone call a comic that. Or are you saying people that use Kickstarter are glorified panhandlers? If that’s the case, no, it doesn’t bother me at all. Speaking of which, this interview is going to cost you $50. Our Kickstarter campaign was successful and has ended. Our secondary fundraising effort can be found on IndieGoGo. You can deposit the 50 smackers here:

http://www.indiegogo.com/projects/the-drink-till-we-re-funny-comedy-tour-reality-series/x/3890390

Matt – What did you call me?

Jay – Shut the f@&k up and hand over your wallet!  You don’t have one?! F&@*ing hipster!

Chris – I think you misspelled “prostitutes”…

Drew – I’ve been called a kike, a Jewish werewolf, and Shia LaBeouf with Down Syndrome. Panhandler doesn’t bother me.

6) I was going to ask if you would be worried about safety, touring a bunch of unfamiliar cities.  but then I realized you are Baltimore based so – are you usually worried about safety when you perform and are you looking forward to spending some time in safer places?

T. Brad – You know what I am looking forward to? Some soft music, scented candles, 8 comics and two beds. Maybe 2 of those coin operated massage beds. If not, we have Kim. She is a massage therapist you know? A male massage therapist.

Matt – You better worry about getting safely from your car to your house Word-Boy!

Jay – A guy got stabbed at the room I headlined last week.  It’s not like we’re reffing a soccer match.

Chris – No one in this group has ever shied away from condoms.  Outside of that, we’ve been assured many times that Baltimore is on the pill.  Several pills, in fact…

Drew – Honestly, I’m just happy to be getting out of my parents’ house.

Thanks so much for the interview. Check out http://www.drinktillwerefunny.com/ for free comedy shows in and around Baltimore and the dates/locations for the upcoming tour. Join the facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DTWFAlert/ and remember to come this Saturday night to Ottobar and then Sunday night at Hightopps grill where yours truly will be part of the bill.

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